We often speak about resilience and instilling a digital resilience in our young people but what does that actually mean. Resilience is not about trying to be ‘so tough’ that nothing impacts us. Resilience is not about putting up with things. Resilience is the ability to recover from setbacks. It is ok to feel sad, angry, happy, worried…it is how we respond and adapt that is key. Digital resilience is the ability to bounce back from difficult times online over time. It involves having the ability to understand when you are at risk online, knowing what to do if anything goes wrong, learning from your experiences of being online, and being able to recover from any difficulties or upsets.
Children who are digitally resilient will be equipped to handle the challenges of the modern, digital world.
Digital resilience grows through online use and learned experience and can’t be developed through the avoidance of the digital world. In other words, you don’t help your children to become digitally resilient by keeping them away from the internet. Our colleagues at CEOP state that ‘’It’s vital that parents ensure children are allowed to explore the online world’
So how can we ensure that we allow our children to explore the online world safely whilst building an online resilience. Here are some simple steps to achieve this:
● Set fair and consistent rules in relation to your child’s internet use at home. As they get older, try to agree the rules with them so that they have some control over their digital world.
● Teach your child to think critically about what they read, see or hear online. For young children, that might mean encouraging them to ask ‘what would Mum or Dad say about that?’ As they get older they need to be able to assess for themselves whether they are in a risky online place and whether the information they are receiving is reliable and helpful to them.
● It’s much harder for people to empathise with each other when their communications are digital. It’s why trolls find it so easy to post horrible messages. Helping your child to understand that and to pause and think about the impact of things that are posted online, will help them cope with some of the difficult behaviour they will come across and avoid getting caught up in it.
● Maintain a positive outlook on your child’s use of the internet. Whatever you think of the stuff they watch or the hours they spend on TikTok or the PS4, if you constantly criticise the apps and games they love, they’re not going to want to talk to you about their online life.
● Children who can recover from an online mistake can learn and avoid making the same mistake again. You can help by making it easy for them to talk to you about their mishaps, making sure they know where to go for help if they need it, and recognising if they’re not recovering well so you can step in and get help for them.
● Allow your child to explore and take charge of their online life. Having some control over any given situation is an important part of resilience – and it’s a really important part of digital resilience. It’s essential in helping them understand and develop their own sense of what’s right and wrong online.
Digital resilience is not fixed. It’s not a single ability or a set of lessons that can be learnt. It is something that every child can have and parents can do more than anyone else to foster it. Set clear boundaries for their life online and then step away, letting them explore the online world safe in the knowledge that you will be there to help if anything goes wrong.